Old friends...
As my cab races across the highway, I note the million thoughts racing through my mind. Ive just met an old friend, and had a rejuvenating weekend…and its made me notice so many things I never realized as time had passed.
The first observation was that old friends can make you rediscover things about yourself. Things that you valued less as you grew old, and forgot. Things that made you who you were before the big, bad world happened. And as you grew old you adapted to experiences that life brought you-some bitter, some hurtful, and so much so that you forgot integral aspects of yourself. You also forgot that that person that you were, was what made you the happiest. You forgot the importance of accepting yourself. Meeting someone who knew you and loved you for the vulnerable, silly, naïve child that you were can make you realize that happiness is in accepting yourself and molding yourself to situations, but never changing your integral being.
The second one was that the reason friendships last is only because of acceptance. You forget about your ego with some people. Its not because they are the most perfect people. Its not even because they would give their life for you-Its because you care so deeply that you’re willing to forego everything to make that relationship work. You probably would be judgemental of the same person had you met them at a different phase in life…but you’re just so committed to that bond that you’d do anything to make it work. I know that I’ve met so many people who were very nice to me, but not bothered about them, while I’ve done more than I ever imagined for some friends even though they weren’t always the nicest. I just accepted those people with their flaws and overcame them because the bond mattered to me. I wouldn’t do it for many people.
The third was that even close bonds can fray and age old friendships can whither if you stop valuing them, and take the bond for granted. Ego can come between friends who grew up together. Its come between the 3 closest people to me. I wish there was a way of helping them come back to that time when acceptance mattered, and all mistakes were forgiven and granted.
Its like this story I read in chicken soup. There was this group of friends, and one of them wanted to befriend these “cooler” set of people. And so this person started getting closer to those “cool” people, and neglected the older friends. A time came when the glamour was gone with the “cool” group, and the shallow relationship emerged. At that time, this person wanted to go back to the old friends. And the old friends just accepted this person back. As if they knew-that this person was likely to do this, and they understood everything, and accepted this person back-no grudges, no explanation required. Just one sorry was good enough, and things were normal.
I know my friends can just forget all their grudges and be just the same as before. I wish they realized how much they would gain if they forgot their ego.
And the last observation I made was that life speeds us by, and old friends will act as photo albums-they will remind you of memories that they hold. Each person you meet will keep a memory of yours with them. You can revisit happy times by just meeting an old friend, even an old acquaintance. I feel lucky to have such friends who can make me happy by their mere presence. It’s the best therapy anyone can ever get.
Friendship is easily the most underrated thing in the world. It’s capable of giving so much to people, and yet betrayal and backstabbing are commonplace. I wish for a world where people would understand the happiness “WE” can give vis-à-vis the loneliness that “I” would inevitably bring.
Cheers to friendship…and old friends.
The first observation was that old friends can make you rediscover things about yourself. Things that you valued less as you grew old, and forgot. Things that made you who you were before the big, bad world happened. And as you grew old you adapted to experiences that life brought you-some bitter, some hurtful, and so much so that you forgot integral aspects of yourself. You also forgot that that person that you were, was what made you the happiest. You forgot the importance of accepting yourself. Meeting someone who knew you and loved you for the vulnerable, silly, naïve child that you were can make you realize that happiness is in accepting yourself and molding yourself to situations, but never changing your integral being.
The second one was that the reason friendships last is only because of acceptance. You forget about your ego with some people. Its not because they are the most perfect people. Its not even because they would give their life for you-Its because you care so deeply that you’re willing to forego everything to make that relationship work. You probably would be judgemental of the same person had you met them at a different phase in life…but you’re just so committed to that bond that you’d do anything to make it work. I know that I’ve met so many people who were very nice to me, but not bothered about them, while I’ve done more than I ever imagined for some friends even though they weren’t always the nicest. I just accepted those people with their flaws and overcame them because the bond mattered to me. I wouldn’t do it for many people.
The third was that even close bonds can fray and age old friendships can whither if you stop valuing them, and take the bond for granted. Ego can come between friends who grew up together. Its come between the 3 closest people to me. I wish there was a way of helping them come back to that time when acceptance mattered, and all mistakes were forgiven and granted.
Its like this story I read in chicken soup. There was this group of friends, and one of them wanted to befriend these “cooler” set of people. And so this person started getting closer to those “cool” people, and neglected the older friends. A time came when the glamour was gone with the “cool” group, and the shallow relationship emerged. At that time, this person wanted to go back to the old friends. And the old friends just accepted this person back. As if they knew-that this person was likely to do this, and they understood everything, and accepted this person back-no grudges, no explanation required. Just one sorry was good enough, and things were normal.
I know my friends can just forget all their grudges and be just the same as before. I wish they realized how much they would gain if they forgot their ego.
And the last observation I made was that life speeds us by, and old friends will act as photo albums-they will remind you of memories that they hold. Each person you meet will keep a memory of yours with them. You can revisit happy times by just meeting an old friend, even an old acquaintance. I feel lucky to have such friends who can make me happy by their mere presence. It’s the best therapy anyone can ever get.
Friendship is easily the most underrated thing in the world. It’s capable of giving so much to people, and yet betrayal and backstabbing are commonplace. I wish for a world where people would understand the happiness “WE” can give vis-à-vis the loneliness that “I” would inevitably bring.
Cheers to friendship…and old friends.
posted by Saumya Chopra at 3:00 AM
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